February 18, 2010

Definition of a Military Wife

One of my favorite people I've never met, Tori, sent me this email yesterday. I kindly let her know immediately that I had full intentions of stealing it to post for all of you to read. I just loved it so much.. so here you go...

A Military Wife: A Poem

Lots of moving...
Moving far from home...
Moving two cars, three kids and one dog...all riding with HER of course.
Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIS house;
Moving curtains that won't fit;
Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours.
Moving away from friends;
Moving toward new friends;
Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.

Often waiting...
Waiting for housing.
Waiting for orders.
Waiting for deployments.
Waiting for phone calls.
Waiting for reunions.
Waiting for the new curtains to arrive.
Waiting for him to come home, For dinner...AGAIN!

They call her 'Military Dependent', but she knows better:
She is fiercely In-Dependent.

She can balance a check book;
Handle the yard work;
Fix a noisy toilet;
Bury the family pet...
She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts.
She can file the taxes;
Sell a house;
Buy a car;
Or set up a move... .....all with ONE Power of Attorney.

She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her.
She reinvents her career with every PCS;
Locates a house in the desert, The Arctic, Or the deep south.
And learns to call them all 'home'.
She MAKES them all home.

Military Wives are somewhat hasty...
They leap into:
Career alternatives,
And friendships. They don't have 15 years to get to know people.
Their roots are short but flexible.
They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.

Military Wives quickly learn to value each other:
They connect over coffee,
Rely on the spouse network,
Accept offers of friendship and favors.
Record addresses in pencil...

Military Wives have a common bond:
The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique.
He doesn't have a 'JOB'
He has a 'MISSION' that he can't just decide to quit...
He's on-call for his country 24/7.
But for her, he's the most unreliable guy in town!
His language is foreign
And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his.
She is the long- distance link to keep them informed;
the glue that holds them together.

A Military Wife has her moments:
She wants to wring his neck;
Dye his uniform pink;
Refuse to move to Siberia;
But she pulls herself together.
Give her a few days,
A travel brochure,
A long hot bath,
A pledge to the flag,
A wedding picture,
And she goes.
She packs.
She moves.
She follows.

What for?
How come?
You may think it is because she has lost her mind.
But actually it is because she has lost her heart.
It was stolen from her by a man,
Who puts duty first,
Who longs to deploy,
Who salutes the flag,
And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband,
She will remain his military wife.
And would have it no other way.

--Author Unknown


Shayla said...


I know I am just getting started in this journey but some of those things relate to me already!

I am SO GLAD there are wives like YOU who understand and share their compassion with newbies like me!!!

Thank You for being such an awesome friend :D

Carrie said...

I love this. Every word is true. :)

...and I just might steal it for a Military Wife post I've been working on for weeks now and couldn't get right... Would you mind?

Stephanie Hartman said...

WOW! I Love this I'm emailing this poem to some of my friends thankyou for posting this...

Expat Girl said...

I loveeee this!

Steph said...

Very true. The sad part is I knew 75% of those acronyms.

Hey do you still have that copy of that paper I wrote about what a military wife is?

Jen said...

I love this!! All of it is so true! Thanks for posting!

Tiffany said...

Thanks for posting this. I've been an Army wife for 16 years, but I still feel every one of these things. They all still apply to me. And we're waiting for PCS orders, so the first part really applies. Another move. But I do it for my husband. I'd go anywhere with him.

Your blog is lovely. You have a new reader! Have a great day! :0)

Karren said...

I love this!! Thanks for sharing

Anonymous said...

Love it! It makes me feel so proud to be an army wife!

Real love stories have no endings said...

I too LOVE this and hope you don't mind put will be printing this to post next to my computer at work and give to all of the wives I know! I have an FRG meeting tomorrow and I am going to pass it out! I have decided to create another postion/welcome committee for new wives and Families and will be including this is my information that I give them.

Jessica you ROCK! I can't wait for you to be in El Paso :)

One Day at a Time said...

love it. got the beginnings of tears in my eyes.

"She MAKES them all home."
my favorite line.

i see this in you, and its different from how you used to be (in a very good way). or maybe i didn't know you as well back then. youre an amazing, strong person, either way :)

Unknown said...

I love it, and it is one I have never read before!

Definitely inspirational...

JG said...

I've never seen this one. Amazing how true it already is, isn't it?

Tori Bella said...

I hate that I feel the need to tell you we haven't really "met" yet. Come to Virginia!!!

Michelle A'etonu said...

this poem is sooooo TRUE. I love it! pretty much the whole time (especially the beginning of it) I was like "that's me, that's me!" I wish I could write poems...I'd write one from the dual military spouse perspective!

JB said...

I've never seen this one before, but I will tell you that it hits home. I love it! Thanks for sharing it with us!

p.s. how's the pregnancy coming along?

Mrs.Cass said...

I love this poem..I left you something over at my blog<3

MyMomfessions said...