No Bad Days Allowed

I've been working this post in my head for a while now, but I've gotten to the point where I'm obsessing over it. So it's time to get the words out.

When you have young children, everyone wants to see you thoroughly enjoying every moment of your life.
"Enjoy every second while you can"
"This is the easiest it will ever be, just wait until they...."
"You'll miss these days"
And many other varieties of the same comments.
 And I'm sure they are right.

Listen, I know how blessed I am. I know how lucky I am to have two healthy, beautiful, thriving children. I know what some people would only give to be in my situation and trust me, I'm very sensitive to that.
But damn if this isn't tough sometimes (a lot of the times).

I'm up with the both of them usually before 7 in the morning. They tag team me on most days. Rise and shine mom, we both need you NOW. It doesn't end until 8:30 at night. So for 13.5 hours I'm on. And it's mostly just me. My partner in all this isn't here. While there are wonderful, precious moments sprinkled in and some days are filled with those moments, there are going to be days where I just cannot find the good in it for the life of me.
The days where I cannot bear to listen to ONE MORE whine. Where I feel like I've heard nothing but cries and temper tantrums. Where I might as well just get a tape recorder and just press myself saying, "get in timeout" every 5 minutes. Days where my back is killing me because every time I go to put my 2 month old down he screams. Days where I'm just flat exhausted by 8pm and I would give anything to have my husband here to give me a break so I can take a shower, a bath, have a glass of wine or just rest for a few minutes. Because while I do have my parents, it's not at all the same as having the other parent with you.

So some days I feel like I'll never get through it. Some days I'm reduced to nothing but tears because that's all I have left. And in that moment, I don't want to hear how lucky I am. I don't want to hear that it's just going to get harder, but OHMYGOD, I can't handle it now, I don't want it to get harder! I don't want to hear that I need to be counting my blessings instead of allowing myself to be human. I don't want to hear that I should basically be sucking it up because, hey life is good.

I know life is good. I know in the grand scheme of things, I'm extremely lucky. But sometimes, I just want to hear that someone else has been there. That they remember how hard it can be and to just hang in there, that tomorrow will be better. Tell me that as hard as it is, that I'm doing a great job. Be as quick to give out any kind of motivation to that mother of young children as you are to scold her for giving in to that long, hard day. Sympathize with her. Build her up.

Because while we already know that the years go by all too fast. the days are extremely long. And sometimes we're just flat tired.

Overwhelmed

I may have set a new record for myself. Longest days straight without blogging? Possibly! It feels like it.

I was doing so well there for a while. I have a section in my super awesome organization binder just for blogging. So I always have a place to jot down ideas when they come to me. (Because after three years of blogging.. almost going on 4 I think(!!)... that's how my brain works. Blog worthy or non-blog worthy events). I have a schedule set up and I usually have so many ideas in my head that, on Sundays I can map out my week of posts. And I mean.. it does get planned out. But you see where that's gotten me.

I feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water. A lot of it is perceived as worse than it really is, I think, because Andrew has decided that 5am is the ideal time to wake up for the day. Not cool, kid, not cool at all. I've gotten to the point over the past two mornings that I'm just turning the monitor off and let him cry.. not because I'm cruel.. but he's GOT to remember that's it's much more fun to sleep until 6:30. I don't fall back asleep anyways, because I can tell that he's not going to go back to sleep. And we're all out of bed by 5:30 and starting our day. Sounds miserable, doesn't it? It is.

Then, I mean... he's 13 months old. I guess that's the magic number with kids... you know.. the one where they start to get extremely determined to have their way. I know it's normal and I know it comes with the territory. If we were sleeping until a decent hour of the morning, I think I could handle it better. But an exhaustion that coffee can't even kick makes tantrums harder to deal with. It makes it hard to get excited about going outside for the 10th time in one day. Please don't get me wrong.. I love how much he can interact with me now. I love that part of this stage. He's almost walking. He's doing better and better about showing me what he wants. He's so incredibly lovey. Sometimes I feel like we're having real conversations. He laughs so much. But I have to get better at planning actual activities with him. Which I've always been excited to do. Doesn't he realize that if he'd just let me sleep for an extra hour and 1/2, we'd have so much more fun?!
My rope is very thin these days. Gone are the days where I could take him anywhere I pleased and he sits and smiles and let's me do my thing. Ha! Gone are the simple days at the Grocery store. Gone are the days where he'd basically do anything I wanted him to do. The nerve of him to have an opinion of his own!
So.. we fight battles daily. I win some, I lose some. Plenty of tears are shed... mostly from him ;) He kicks and screams and yells all of his frustration out multiple times a day. By 4:00 I think I'm going to lose my ever loving mind if I hear one more shriek/cry/scream. Trey comes home and I fight the urge to run out the door while he has it open (kidding, kidding.. kind of). And then it's all forgotten the second he says, "mama" in that sweet little voice. Or cuddles up to me to read. Or hugs his dog or glow worm. Or even better.. me.

I know this is just a season. Can you tell that I have to tell myself that a lot? I have less and less time for myself, but I know that's only going to diminish even more so. I'll be okay with that eventually. I'm just having a hard time balancing all my roles. Wife. Mother. Friend. Daughter. Between wife and mother... I'm really, really slacking at being a good friend. Any free time I get that's not used on Andrew goes to trying to keep my house in some sort of an order. My poor friends! I can't tell you how many emails have sat there.. unanswered. I do good to answer a text message the day after I get it. I've been a huge flake all around and even screwed up with a play date. I feel terrible.

I know I will sort everything out. I'll adjust. I'll be able to balance everything better. I know I need to MAKE time for myself. To get to PWOC (I didn't make it this morning and it crushed me), to blog (I NEED to blog), to.. ya know.. have a conversation with a friend (If I have any left ;)  )

So bear with me. If anyone has figured toddlers and time management out, feel free to leave me your magic tips!

It Took Me 6 Days to Write This

This post will be a little hard for me to write. Well, not necessarily to write, but to click that Publish Post button on the bottom. I've had so much on my plate lately and all of these things I've been trying to sort through in my mind. They haven't necessarily gotten better per say, but I'm coming to terms with everything. I'm not putting all of this out there to get sympathy.. I don't do well with sympathy really... I just want to be honest with my blog and not just write about the "unicorns and glitter stuff". I don't usually write about the bad stuff.. who wants to look back and remember the bad? Not I! But this is all big stuff and a real part of my life that I'll remember anyways..

I had a pretty hard time after Andrew was born. I wouldn't necessarily classify it as Post Partum depression, I think it was just coincidental that life decided to throw up on me at that point. After a couple weeks of feeling out of control of my emotions, sad and overwhelmed like I've never felt before, I decided to bring it up to my doctor at my 6-week checkup. She agreed with me that I have a tad bit of depression after talking for a while and we decided to start me on a prescription for Welbutrin. At first, I was ashamed. I've always been able to brush things off my shoulders and look at the bright side. I would definitely say that I am a glass half full kind of girl. But those hormones after pregnancy are no joke. I think too many people try to ignore symptoms of depression, but if more people would just talk about it, maybe it wouldn't be such a hard thing for women to admit. It's better to realize you have a problem before it gets out of control and you start having thoughts about harming yourself or your baby. It doesn't have to get to that point. So, on with my point... on top of those crazy hormones:


He looks how I have been feeling!

I was feeling homesick like never before. I was dealing with being away from family before Andrew came along. Sure, I missed home and got down about it from time to time, but now I have a son. My parents and Trey's parents have a grandson and it makes me incredibly sad that they are missing out on all of his little milestones. I have a very real sense of guilt. I know that is irrational. Nobody makes me feel guilty, I do it to myself. I feel like I'm taking a special time in life away from my mom. The thought of Andrew only seeing extended family a few times a year (if Trey decides to make a career out of the Army) tears me up. I need to get these feelings under control and I feel like time *and medicine* is helping. The whole "bloom where you are planted" thing is starting to really sink in with me. Sure, I would LOVE to be around our family and friends all the time, but I can't waste life away wishing for something that isn't possible for now. I'm going to make the best out of the situation we are in and appreciate the opportunities we wouldn't have had otherwise!

I second, triple, and quadruple guessed myself about sharing this, but again, I'm sure we're not the only ones going through it in this economy! We came to the realization that we have to let go of our house in SC. We've had renters in it since we left, but 1) the county raised our taxes by an ungodly amount because it is an investment property now. That starts in January and there is NO WAY we can afford the increase. 2) The renters helped with the situation of course, but they decided they wanted out last month. So, we're barely holding on. We couldn't rent the house for as much as it will be going up anyways. Best case scenario - it will sell in the next 2 months. We dropped the price drastically, so we'll see. Second best - the bank will approve a short sale which we're in the process of going for. That won't hurt our credit quite so badly as a foreclosure would. Hopefully, it won't get to that point! This was all very hard for me to come to terms with. It's embarrassing, ya know!? I know, though that it's not something we could control. We'll do whatever we have to do and move on from there. Safe to say that we won't be buying a home again until we are done with the Army and can settle somewhere!



Not a happy camper!



Remember this post and this one? About my Uncle Ronnie who had a scary time with seizures? He ended up being put on seizure medication for what was supposed to be 6 months. Well a couple months ago he had another seizure. While on medication. Not supposed to happen! He went in for more tests and to make a very long story very short... turns out he had a tumor on his brain. He had surgery last week and they were able to remove 95% of it. It is stage 3 cancer, but the doctor seems to be pretty optimistic about his survival chances. He will be starting 6 weeks of chemo and radiation soon, every day except weekends and holidays. I've been a praying fool for this man lately and I truly believe in my heart that everything will end up okay, he has a lot more life to live! It's been such a scary time and I wish more than anything that I could be in Massachusetts with my family.. it's been hard and scary for me. I can't even imagine what they are going through. I'm very thankful that I have such a tight knit and positive thinking family that will make the best out of any situation they are put it. I know they are all helping each other through it.

I know I am putting all of our dirty laundry out there for all to read, and I feel slightly crazy for doing so. But I wanted to be real. If anyone of you may be going through the any of the same things and feelings, I wanted you to see that you're not alone. If you are dealing with depression, it CAN get better. Take some time to invest in yourself. Talk to a doctor. Make a stronger effort to focus on the things you have in life to be thankful for. It helps and there are ALWAYS things you can feel blessed about. You may have to dig deep and start with small things, but the positive thinking will come easier to you, I promise!
I'm completely aware that I sound like an After-School Special. Sorry about that.

Remember to smile!

The One Where I Piss Off Le Leche League

This post may be a little TMI for some so proceed at your own risk.

My boobs are officially my own again after 11 whole months. I'm done pumping. Completely over it.
It wasn't a decision I came to easily. I've been strug-A-lin for a few weeks now, but didn't want to admit defeat. Mainly, I didn't want to feel like a failure. I finally came to terms with the fact that this just wasn't for me when Trey woke up the other night and came out to find silent little baby tears strolling down my cheeks as I'm pumping quietly in the dark.
Ouch Charlie is all I have to say! Pumping full time is not so easy! Over the past 2 weeks I've been having serious problems. My nipples (Lord I can't believe I said nipples on my blog) would start to bleed and crack so I would spread the pumps out relieve them, which in turn would cause clogged ducts. Those really hurt like a mother, let me tell you! It was this big viscious cycle and was making me miserable. I dreaded the every few hours that I had to do it. I was just plain bitter by the middle of this week.
After a long discussion, we both decided that it just wasn't the best thing to do anymore. Breastfeeding should be this wonderful, rewarding experience and THIS TIME, it just wasn't for me. I'll try again with the next kid.
I don't buy in to the whole idea that because I'm now giving my baby formula that he won't be as smart or healthy as breastfed babies. I know it's most ideal to breastfeed, but Andrew will not be inferior because of it. Trust me, I know this for a fact. How you ask? I was breastfed. My youngest brother was not. I was mediocre at best in school and didn't try very hard. My brother... such a smart kid and has a great head on his shoulders! I've been worried because I know switching over is hard on their little tummies and he has been a little fussy with it up until today. My mum made me feel much better though when she asked my brother if he remembers her switching, and he has no recollection ;)

I know people are very passionate about breastfeeding, but please don't use this as a forum to be ugly to me about it. I've already had my share of meanie pants comments about it, but KNOW that I am doing the right thing for my baby and I. Trust me, I'm a much happier mum and that's important too!

The One Where I Got Real and Poured My Heart Out a Bit

Insecurity... should be my middle name!

I've heard about this book from every angle in my life over the past couple of months - Beth Moore's So Long, Insecurity: you've been a bad friend to us. Looking back, I'm pretty sure God was shoving this book in my face, pleading with me to read it. From as many places as I heard about it, to walking into the library here and seeing it front and center on the shelf staring at me. The first time I saw it, I picked it up and set it right back down. I didn't have the energy to deal with that, I said. I wanted to read something light-hearted and fun. Plus, I don't do well with "self help" books. I get bored with them easily and have never, ever finished one that I've picked up. But, when I saw it staring at me yet again today I picked it up again, determined to walk out of the library with it. I've always enjoyed Beth Moore's sass anyways, so how bad could it be, right?

It took me a LONG time to even admit to myself that I am an insecure person. If you know me in real life, you might even be saying to yourself.. no way.. Jessica.. no way she is insecure. I do a very good job at faking it ladies. Or at least I think I do. I also know there are a few people that I know see right through me, but honestly, it's something I struggle with every single day and something I consciously try to cover up quite a bit.

*Now, don't get me wrong... I wouldn't consider myself to be a fake person by any means. I wouldn't want anyone to get that impression. For the most part, what you see is really what you get. I do love to have a good time. I do care deeply. I do love to laugh. But I am VERY insecure at the same time.
*I do worry, quite a good bit, about what other people think of me in all kinds of situations and I'm ready to change that. It's exhausting and I wish I could just be confident in my own skin.

I feel like Mrs. Moore and I are very similar in our insecurities. In the 2nd chapter, she asks some of these questions.. questions that made her realize her own insecurities. I feel like I filled in her answers myself:
Do I cry easily? YESSSS. She did say no. That was the only place where we differed.
Do I avoid the spotlight in social situations? Heck No! Which is where I think I would come off as a secure person. I thrive being the center of attention (in certain.. most.. situations)
Here's where it really hit home though...
Do I have a strong desire to make amends whenever I think I've done something wrong? Oh wow.. do I ever. It's even possible that I feel very certain in my mind that I've done nothing wrong. Give it some time.. as in a few minutes to an hour.. it'll get very far under my skin if the other party thinks that I'm wrong.. in enters serious self doubt inside myself. I'll go to no ends to make sure everything is alright.
If someone is angry at me, do I have a hard time not thinking about it? I obsess. It's not pretty.
Do I sometimes feel anxious for no apparent reason? More than I let on.
Does it hurt my feelings when I learn that someone doesn't like me? It devastates me.

Another big thing that she has brought up twice so far that really hits home, is part of the definition of insecurity... " a deep uncertainty about whether his or her own feelings and desires are legitimate". I do this to myself ALL. THE. TIME. I can't think of any sure examples right now, but I do question myself and the way I feel about things constantly.

I'm really going to be working on these things. It's not healthy and it's not the way God made us to be. I could be completely missing out on something that He wants me to be doing in my life right now because my insecurities are getting in the way. So, I guess my main point in sharing all of this, is 1. maybe someone out there reading this can totally relate.. if so and you want to do something about it.. get this book. 2. I want to be more open and honest about this. I'm not saying I'm going to blog about this topic any certain amount of time a week or anything, but expect more posts. I'll blog about it when something has really struck me while reading.

I'm not expecting this book to be a miracle cure. I'm going to read it and really let it sink in. Hopefully, it will spark something in me to make some changes.

I know a few of you out there have read this lately. Did any of you finish it? What did you think? Did it make a big difference in your life?

*See, I did it right there. Explaining myself way too much, for fear of what people reading this will think of me.

Hi, my name is Jessica...

and I have an addiction problem.

Yes, it's true. I am addicted to the Internet.

I've been seeing a little survey going around on blogger, where the husband answers questions about his wife. I thought it was cute and was curious to see what my husband would say, so I put him up to it. He begrudgingly obliged. I had full intentions of posting it up this week, but then decided against it. For as much of an open person I am, Trey is completely the opposite. He's a very private person and took the survey a lot more seriously then I thought he would. All of the answers were sweet and it turned out to be a good thing because it opened up conversation between us. We talked for probably an hour after it. TV off, no distractions, just us chatting. Sadly, that doesn't happen as often as it should.

The only reason I bring this up is that it made me realize my "addiction". I will share one answer-
Q: What is one thing your wife does that drives you crazy? (for real, not in a freaky way)
A: Spends a lot of time on the Internet (blogs and facebook) and then stresses out when you haven't gotten anything done.

At first I was defensive. I have found myself feeling bad because I'm not getting as much done around the house as I used to. And when he comes home, sometimes I talk to him about that. But that has nothing to do with my being on the Internet and all to do with the fact that I just don't have the energy right now (my growing child is sucking it all right out of me). So it was important to me to get that misconception out of the way.
He explained that he doesn't care that the house isn't immaculate or that he has to pick up some of the slack. What's really been bothering him is the fact that we'll wake up on a Saturday morning and after breakfast, he's ready to go go go. Especially being in a new city... he wants to get out there and explore it. In the meantime, I'm sitting around checking facebook, reading waaayyy too many blogs and trying to comment on whatever I feel the need to comment on, and even writing one of my own posts. Two hours later, he's incredibly antsy and I don't want to do much because of the heat.

He has a major point. He works hard all week and looks forward to the weekend to spend some QT together and do something new. Here I am, so wrapped up in myself, that I'm not even thinking about what he wants to do. Of course I want to spend time with him. And I do want to get out there and do as much as we can by ourselves before Andrew gets here. And yes, I'd love to get an early start before the heat takes every ounce of energy out of me. But I can't deny the fact that I almost feel some sort of responsibility towards blogger as well. And that is just ridiculous.

To get to the point... I'm going to be going back to the basics. I've already started going through blogs and deciding which ones I really can't live without. That way I'll still be reading the ones that I'm really connected to and can relate to, and hopefully leave more thoughtful comments on those. I'm going to have to cut the amount that I have been reading way back and I hope I don't offend anyone by doing so. I'd love to keep up with every one's blog that follows mine, but I also need to put real life first. I've gotten way too sucked into this online world. At the same time, I don't want to dissuade new followers from introducing yourselves!
I'm going to attempt to cut blogging out during the weekend as well. Baby steps here...

Thanks for listening to me blab and I hope everyone can understand!

Hello, my name is Jessica...

... and I am addicted to playing Bejeweled on FB. I can't get enough and my competitive nature can't stand that there are four people ahead of me with higher scores. It does really aggravate me that you only have a minute to get your big score and raises my bp a little more than it probably should.

... and I'm scared that I may be getting a stomach bug. We had friends stay at our house Sunday night (their power went off) and while getting coffee yesterday afternoon, she really didn't feel too hot. She sent me a text last night saying she had the bug. This morning I talk to another friend who says her little boy had it for two days as well as another one of the wives little girls. Both of whom I had dinner with (held and canoodled) Saturday night. I'm sitting here thinking that I may be a little nauseous, but I'm praying that it's all in my head.. I'm good at doing that.

... and I really need to clean my house. I've ignored my cleaning list for the past week. Shame on me.

... and I really miss my family. I secretly want to dig into our savings and buy a plane ticket home, but I'm way too responsible for that. No, not me, I wouldn't do that when I have a bridesmaids dress to get altered and shipped to MA and a plane ticket to buy to ship myself to the same place.

... and I may or may not be fantasizing about walking outside, taking the hammer out of the nice construction workers hands, and smashing his fingers with said hammer so he can't hammer one second longer. Aggressive? Maybe... but I cannot take one more day of them "fixing" our apartment building.

The Hard Truth

I am not in a good place right now. I'm not myself at all.
I think I've been fighting this off and on for a couple of months now, but I really think I've fallen into a for real state of depression or something and it's gotten to the point where I'm worried about myself. All I want to do is stay in bed. It's extremely hard for me to get out. I thank God I was called back into work until I leave (a week from today) because I really don't know what I would have done with myself. It's hard for me to eat. Those that know me best are probably ready to have me committed after hearing that. I live for food. Lately the thought of it turns my stomach.
It's gotta be the fact that a big fat dose of reality has hit me about moving. I don't know why I'm so worked up about it. I can't explain why. All I know is every day that it gets closer, the deeper and deeper I sink in to this funk. I don't feel like that is normal. I want to get more and more excited every day because I'm that much closer to living with Trey again. But the simple truth is I'm not. The thought of getting in that car next week and driving away makes me nauseous.
The few people that I've talked to about this that are not military, tell me that this is normal. That I've been living on my own for 8 months and they completely understand how scary it must be to just pack everything up and just go. For the first time in my life, I'm packing up my car and leaving everything I know and am comfortable with. They understand the thoughts that are literally breaking my heart.
What I'm afraid of though, is what everyone else thinks. You girls that have been through this and have been going through it for a long time. Is this normal or do I need some serious help? Please tell me this gets better!

Ouch Charlie!

If you've never seen the Ouch Charlie video on YouTube *shame on you* you must click here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OBlgSz8sSM
I still cannot get videos to post on here so I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but your life really isn't complete unless you've seen this.

Now that that's out of the way ~
I woke up this morning to a pretty painful eyelid. Actually, painful is not really the right word for it. More like aggravating. Like makes me want to punch a hole through the wall type of aggravating. I'm very aware of my eye being there. It's pretty swollen (just the lid, by my eyelashes) and red. The inside isn't red though and it's not itchy so I don't believe it's pink eye. A stye maybe? I don't know.. I don't think I've ever even so much as conjunctivitis! We'll see.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE a clean house. Not to toot my own horn... hell, why not.... I did a damn good job. It was so necessary though. Embarrassingly necessary.
CONFESSION: * ohhhh i cannot believe I'm going to admit this to y'all * Ready? That maayyyy have been the first time I mopped my kitchen/dining room/entry way floors since I've moved in. Last February. As in Feb 2008. It's okay.. say what you will... I'm laughing at myself out loud right now. Mum was pretty grossed out when I told her this and she realized she's recently walked on those same floors with bare feet.
Anywho... house looks great now. I haven't started boxing up anything per say, but I did take a lot of junk that I probably won't EVER need or use, never mind need or use in the next 2 (or 4.. depending on how things go) months, and put it all in one room, separated into different piles. Now I just need boxes.
*side note* we'll find out where it is we'll be moving not this coming up Friday but the Friday after for his BOLC III. That'll last for about 5 1/2 months, so heck yes, I'm packing up and going with him.

My only other plan for today: I'm going to buy an American Flag to hang out on our porch. Then I'm going to hang it. And do one more load of laundry. And nurse my inflamed eye. The End.

Blog maintenance:
Can anyone see anything on the right side?? Ya know.. like the "About me" and pictures? Or anything? I can't see it and I'm not sure where it went.
Also, I've been racking my brain for a new name for my little blog. I'm leaning towards "Learning As We Go". Referring of course to being new with this whole Military life and (me more so than hubs) being clueless about it, but excited about what's to come. Any thoughts??

Not enough time in the day

At one point today, as I was standing endlessly by the copier, getting files to closing, I seriously prayed to God and asked him to add more hours into my day. I was only 1/2 joking. The day is just not long enough. I never get everything I want/need to in. And really.. i'm only asking for about 2 more hours.. maybe 3. One more hour dedicated to sleep. The other two hours for blogging and tv watching. Come on Big Man.. that's not too much to ask is it? I mean part of it is dedicated to Him afterall since I've started doing a daily Bible reading. All I ask is for a 27 hour day in return..

In other news.. I'm kind of ashamed of myself, and like always, feel the need to repent. Last night as I'm cooking dinner, there's a loud knock on the door. Trey goes to answer it and it's a fireman asking for donations for our local volunteer department. Trey invites him in. I go hide in the bedroom because I'm in my pj's and no bra. Lovely site for Mr. Fireman! When I hear him leave, I come out, only to be met by him proclaiming so so proudly that he gave Mr. Fireman a check for $50. I spazzed. I probably shouldn't of. He was so proud of what he did. As a sidenote, to get me ready for the possibility of him leaving, I've taken over keeping up with all of our money and bills. So I know our money situation probably shouldn't have allowed us to give Mr. Fireman $50. But I feel really really badly. He was doing something out of the kindness of his heart, to people that really need it, I'm sure. And I spazzed. I have since apologized.

Can I get an Amen for the weekend!!! I don't think I've needed one more in my life. I'm just plain exhausted! I don't plan on doing a thang Friday night. Saturday we have a jack and jill baby shower to go to for our sweet friends Wendy and Tim that are due *ahem* right around my birthday in March. It's funny how life goes by in spurts like this. For the past couple years it's been allll about the weddings. Constantly. Now it looks like we're making a turn for the baby years. I think I'll be a little behind on this boat.. but you never know!! I wouldn't complain.
Saturday night we are hanging out with some other friends, but I don't want to stay out too late.. why you ask??
After months of searching.. wasn't searching too too hard to be honest.. we've finally found "our" church out here in Lexington. I LOVE it. It's perfect. I love the pretty drive there. I loved that I felt welcome and comfortable from the moment I stepped foot in this place. I love that they have a young married couples Bible study - at the church - right before, or after, depending on what service you go to - I love that when the preacher read out of his Bible, he was reading out of the same one I was. Not a different version. I loved that I didn't space out once during his sermon. I loved the music. So.. that's what I'll be doing Sunday morning. Our first week of Bible study.. then service at 11. I'm very excited about this!!
If only I can make it through one more day of this tourture some people like to call work...