September 6, 2009

Denial?

I am feeling NO emotion about this move that is quickly becoming a reality! I don't know what's wrong with me. I came to this conclusion yesterday when I realized I was saying OUT LOUD that I was sad and dreading it, but that's not what I was feeling inside. I've always been such an emotional person, so much so that you might have classified me as emotionally unstable (yeah... that bad), so I think I have been saying that I'm sad and upset because that's what everyone expects me to say (myself included).
I thought I was going to be a WRECK on my last day of work. Not at all. (I'll save that day for it's own separate post). When I think about seeing our friends and families for the last time, I have NO sense of dread or sadness. I really don't think I'm going to even cry. Don't get me wrong... I'm going to miss everyone terribly, but when I moved 15 minutes away from my family I bawled for the entire night. Something's not right here!

I'm thinking the answer to this could be a multitude of things

1. I'm growing up and maturing (ha.. doubtful)
2. I know that it's not really goodbye. My grandfather always taught us that it's "see you later". Goodbye means never again.
3. I'm just that excited to live in a new place with Trey.
4. I'm cold hearted and have no feelings. (kidding)
5. Between blogging, facebook, email, texting, and good ol' fashioned phone calls, I won't feel like I'm very far away anyways.
6. My last thought and hopefully not the correct one.... I have a big fat case of denial.

Of course I'm going to miss everyone, but I think I've been waiting for this for so long that I'm just ready to get this show on the road! We have our transportation briefing Wednesday morning. My first one ever! Wish me luck!!

4 comments:

Katie said...

Its true--nowadays its easy to feel 'closer' to people with technology. I'm also willing to bet it's the maturing thing too ;)

Jacylann Nix said...

where ya moving too?? good luck! we just did all that! BLAH!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Besides numbers 4 and 6 I think you're right. I think with everything from texting, online talking and skype that we can always feel close to our families. Plus you'll be with the love of your life!

Ashleigh said...

its probably just so hard to process- youve never had to do this before!
plus there reaches a point where youve gone through all the emotions already, and now its just time to go.

and a mix of everything you mentioned, besides #4