I do my best thinking from the shower. I can't be the only one. I really think it's the only time of day that I am truly alone. All day. No toddler pulling me in one direction in the other. I don't hear kiddy sing along music or the sound of "ca's" driving around the house. No husband to interrupt my thoughts with a random conversation about work, football, or brilliant ideas that only he could think up. No phone ringing or beeping with text messages. Nothing. Just me, steam, and silence.
Most shower sessions are very random. For instance...
1) Why does it seem, that even though most everyone we all know are adults, that a lot of the times we can't talk to each other like adults. I find that often, when people are mad at each other/thinks someone's upset with them/ has their feelings hurt, that it's based off of assumptions. We assume tone through text or email and don't clarify. We hear something that someone said and let it fester forever. Someone unknowingly does something to hurt our feelings and we never clear the air. I think, as a general rule, most of us hate confrontation, even if it's done in a kind, gentle manner. We don't pick up the phone and ask our friend or family member what they meant by that text and make sure we weren't reading into it. We stick a tone into it and let ourselves get all worked up.. possibly over nothing. When rumors are started and we hear that so and so said this or that about you (or anything like that) we play into it instead of talking to said person and finding out what's really going on. When our feelings are hurt, we don't sit down with the person who did whatever it may be and let them know how it made you feel.
I'm not talking about myself at the moment or any certain situation (I don't want my friends reading this and racking their minds over whether or not they did something to hurt me.. ha!) I try to put my fear of confrontation to the side and talk things out with people. If our relationship is important enough to me, you'll know if something is wrong. I've just seen this happening a few times lately and it makes me sad. Important relationships that you may really benefit from aren't even given a chance because of assumptions.
If you feel like I'm talking to you right now, and again, I'm not speaking to anyone in particular, maybe you should think about this and work on fixing a relationship over the holiday. Tis the season, right? Yes, I do feel like every bit of a Hallmark commercial, but just go with me here. I felt the need to share, maybe someone needed to hear it!
2) Trey took on a temporary position (that he someday in the near future will actually hold) this month and let me tell you.. I almost forget what he looks like! He's working very long days and we hardly see him. I've been sick with strep and exhausted, but not really complaining (to him at least.. my poor girlfriends!), but the other night he came home and let me know just how badly he felt about it all. He was actually apologizing. It was a particular night that he wasn't home until after 8 and had been gone since 6:30. I let him know that, although it's been a little difficult and tiring, he had no reason to be feeling badly or apologizing. I know that if he could choose, he'd be right here with us. First of all, he's getting great experience and is actually enjoying himself. Secondly, I don't have to worry about whether or not he's hurt or alive at the moment. Too many of my friends' husbands are deployed and 4 guys from their unit have been killed in action over the past two weeks. Enough said. He's home. He's safe. You won't see me complaining.. too much.
3) I don't have any Christmas presents wrapped and it's the last thing I feel like doing. It's all big chunky toys. I don't know how to wrap things like that.
4) I thought I was dying last week. At the very least, I couldn't explain why I was so tired. I couldn't make it through the day without either napping when Drew did or crashing as soon as he went to bed. Turns out I had strep throat. A day and 1/2 on my antibiotics and I feel like a new woman! Such a relief!
That's all. My thoughts aren't always as involved. Sometimes they are ridiculous and wouldn't be deserving of a blog post. Like the last two points. But some need a way to get out!