Looking Back

Last night, I tuned into my regular Sunday night programming, Army Wives. I STILL love that show and hope against all hopes that it continues. I always look forward to it (no matter how silly it gets or how unrealistic it really is, but I was a little extra excited last night. Fort Bliss's Commander's wife, Mrs. Lucille Pittard, was a guest on the show! I knew she was flown out a while back and saw all of her pictures... so I've been looking forward to the episode for quite some time. She looked great and even got a big shot out from General Holden (squeal), but this is actually not what I want to talk about today.

It was finally time to Roxy give birth to her twins. The first one comes out without a problem. They are gushing over him, holding him, etc.. and I'm left there thinking for what felt like 5 minutes, "Wait.. I SWEAR she was having twins. Did she lose one? Did I miss something?" Then finally, we know. There are complications. She is rushed back for an emergency c-section and when the baby comes out, he's not okay. Cord wrapped around the neck and has to be rushed off to be hooked up to the respirator.

My breath caught and I was in tears immediately. I know this happens quite often, and while I can certainly empathize with anyone going through that situation and I would never wish it on my worst enemy, I don't fall apart every time I hear about it. What got me was watching Roxy and Trevor's reactions. The terrifying scene of watching them scoop your baby away without you getting a second with him and they don't have time to explain, the unknown, the doctor's not being able to answer your questions, the whole, "the next 24 hours are critical" speech.

One of our first looks at our sweet boy

 Having to leave the hospital without him and come home to everything you had set up for him, going back for visits and FINALLY that sweet moment when you are able to touch him for the first time.

My first touch.

When the "what-ifs" become more hopeful, but you still have to wait. It all hit so close to him. I relived every single one of those emotions all over again. (To make the situations even more similar.. they named him Drew...... Right?!?)

He got better and better by the day. We were thankful for one less machine attached to him  each time.

And then we finally got our day. I can remember, just like Roxy, staring at him and staring at him. Trying to let it all sink in. We had our baby home and oh, THIS is what it's supposed to be like!

On our way home after 12 excruciating days at the NICU

This little reminder, if you will, came just a few weeks before that fragile, but incredibly strong at the same time boy turns 2 YEARS old. My normal, rambunctious, on-the-go-nonstop, sweet, loving, hilarious, smart, handsome boy is just a few weeks away from turning 2.

And Trey and I both feel as if we are the luckiest parents on the face of this earth. He's ours and he's healthy and beyond happy. I'm not sure what life meant before you got here Drewby, but I can say with fair certainty, the everything.. every choice your Daddy and I made... it all led up to you! We were just waiting for you to be a part of our lives. Happy almost birthday sweet boy!